I’m in a Kali kind of mood today.
I spent part of the morning writing and then I took a break to clean out several more bins and organize them for the big move west at the end of September. While sorting out a bunch of crap, I found all of these old bills and what not that I have no plan on keeping, but when I found them, I had no idea what to do with them. Miraculously, my shredder appeared and the party was on!
Shred those fuckers and make your own packing material for your move!
I swear that I heard Kali whispering in my ear at the time.
So who is Kali and why should you care about her?
Well, she’s a Hindu Goddess. The Goddess of Empowerment, Time, Black night, destruction and creation. She’s Shiva’s lover and consort. Want to learn more about her? Well, let me introduce you to my friend W.I. Kipedia. He’s my best friend when I want to learn about shit.
Anyway…Kali is one of those goddesses. Super powerful, strong and not to be fucked with. She also destroys and creates shit. You gotta love that!!
That’s the kind of mood I am in today. A total Kali mood that’s both destructive and creative. I also don’t want to be fucked with today. I destroyed my old bills and created packing material for the move. Somehow, this act has become symbolic for what’s going on right now in my life. I’ve been tearing down my old life here in Massachusetts one box and bin at a time in preparation for a new life that awaits me back in New Mexico.
Do I have it all planned out?
But I have a plan
Now, I swear that Kali is sitting somewhere in her goddess realm completely proud of me for what I’ve been accomplishing the last few weeks.
Before creation there must be destruction. An ending of the old ways. A clearing out of the past, physical, mental and emotional.
We’ve been taught to fear change when we really shouldn’t. Change is a good thing. Sometimes we have to destroy the old to make room for the new.
If you find yourself afraid of change, just sit with it a while.
What is it that you really fear?
Is it the actual change?
Maybe that you fear how people will react to the change you made.
Do you feel that if you change, maybe you will lose some crucial part of who you are? Your identity on some level?
While I’ve been cleaning, I’ve been discovering that part of me was afraid that by giving away things from my past, that I would be dishonoring the memories of the fabulous, albeit somewhat crazy life I have led, and therefore myself. Like I needed to keep these things around me to remind me who I am, what I’ve done and where I’ve been..
And then I realized that it wasn’t true.
I am still me with or without those things. Still whole, still beautiful, still amazing, still funny and still crazy..
The things are just things. They are not me…..
Just as your things are not you. You are you!
And you are fabulous and amazing and wonderful too!
You don’t need things to be who you are or to remember the life you’ve led. You just need you.
So find your Kali and let her help you if you feel afraid of changing your life for the better by destroying the old to let in room for the new!