The Condo in Purgatory
I already did some journal writing today, but I’m still fucking frustrated and I don’t know what to do next. Do I write a blog? Do I create a new e-course? A freebie? Do I pack and clean some more? Do I just sit here and wallow in my frustration?
What the fuck am I supposed to do now?
How do I quell my fiery discontent and restlessness?
I wish I was already back in New Mexico and this move was already behind me. Fact is, I don’t like having to fucking wait for anything. To say that I am fucking impatient would be a massive understatement. I want everything done and taken care of right fucking now. Not tomorrow or in an hour. I do not want to wait one more fucking minute. It needs to be done so I can move on and get back some semblance of a fucking routine and normal daily life. For reals, this is Purgatory.
I am living in the Condo of Purgatory.
Yeah. I don’t believe in hell or heaven, but I sure as shit believe in Purgatory.
Anyway….here’s the deal! I am neither here nor there. I’m in fucking between places. Gah…..it sucks! No wonder Dante wrote a whole book about it. Because I am moving in three weeks, where I am right now isn’t where I will be or want to be…and I fucking hate it here. I’m ready to move now. Ready to move on and heal from my time here in New England. Ready to lick my wounds and begin again, only this time with more wisdom and experience and strength. I want to go NOW!!! Fuck waiting.
I have more important things to do when I get back to New Mexico….and I want to start them now.
and though I do have things to do here, I don’t give a shit about them. I’m done with this stupid condo and noisy neighbors. What else is there here? Oh yeah… Packing and cleaning. I think I’d rather go to the dentist and get a root canal done with no anesthetic today. Seriously. Yeah, I am soo not in the mood for either of those things. Most of the house is already packed and I am not packing up the rest of it until the week before the movers come. ….so what’s next? What now?
You ever feel like this? Frustrated? Angry? Restless?
Well, fuck….I gotta do something before I go completely bat-shit crazy…….
and I apologize for not having any nuggets of peaceful zen woo-woo wisdom for you today. You’ll have to find your own just as I have to go find my own.
Thanks for listening to me rant!